Delinquency & Oreos
OK, before I explain where I've been and what I've been doing (forthcoming post will provide details) I have to ask WHAT IS WRONG WITH THE PEOPLE WHO MAKE OREOS?!?!? Apparently, they have a vendetta against my butt.
We have been in the Wild West for a wedding. Before we left I thought, "Wow, what a nice way to spend a vacation -- hanging out with friends, hiking in the Grand Canyon, etc." Well, if you want to hear my child laugh, just tell him my plans. He decided to stay on Central Time rather than adapt like the rest of us to AZ time. As a result, I slept approximately 4.5 hours in 4.5 days. Plus I ate a lot of sugar (including oreos from the Southwest Airlines snack packs) and drank a lot of coffee & wine. This has all conglomerated into one big mental illness festival.
When I returned there was another letter from NWA about my demolished breast pump ... my contact there has discussed the matter with her manager and together they still maintain that the airline is not responsible. Astonishing. Now I'm threatening small claims court, so I'm guessing that that will be another forthcoming post. I plan on showing up in court barefoot with the baby on my hip to plead my case.
Also when I returned there were Brown Recluse Spiders all over my house. They had a hobo party while we were gone, hatched a bunch of eggs, and provided yet another venue for my mental illness (OCD). So I spent all day today running around town buying glue-traps and eucalyptus leaves for the spiders. While in Michael's getting the eucalyptus, I ran into my biggest competitor in the the Ms. Nashville Mental Institution Pageant, who tried to give me advice about growing fake flowers and avoiding poisonous vermin (this included a story about Jesus, her brother-in-law, and a lemon meringue pie recipe, which are somehow related to her own version of arachnid invasion).
By the time I finally made it home, I couldn't do anything but crack open a beer and the rest of the Southwest snack packs. I polished off the oreos and have now started in on the Cheese Nips.
So that's where I've been. I know you were all just standing on your heads wondering what happened to me. I hope to stay close to home for a while now. I was having blogger withdrawals. And now I'm having snackpack withdrawals, so I better go find some more hidden oreos.
We have been in the Wild West for a wedding. Before we left I thought, "Wow, what a nice way to spend a vacation -- hanging out with friends, hiking in the Grand Canyon, etc." Well, if you want to hear my child laugh, just tell him my plans. He decided to stay on Central Time rather than adapt like the rest of us to AZ time. As a result, I slept approximately 4.5 hours in 4.5 days. Plus I ate a lot of sugar (including oreos from the Southwest Airlines snack packs) and drank a lot of coffee & wine. This has all conglomerated into one big mental illness festival.
When I returned there was another letter from NWA about my demolished breast pump ... my contact there has discussed the matter with her manager and together they still maintain that the airline is not responsible. Astonishing. Now I'm threatening small claims court, so I'm guessing that that will be another forthcoming post. I plan on showing up in court barefoot with the baby on my hip to plead my case.
Also when I returned there were Brown Recluse Spiders all over my house. They had a hobo party while we were gone, hatched a bunch of eggs, and provided yet another venue for my mental illness (OCD). So I spent all day today running around town buying glue-traps and eucalyptus leaves for the spiders. While in Michael's getting the eucalyptus, I ran into my biggest competitor in the the Ms. Nashville Mental Institution Pageant, who tried to give me advice about growing fake flowers and avoiding poisonous vermin (this included a story about Jesus, her brother-in-law, and a lemon meringue pie recipe, which are somehow related to her own version of arachnid invasion).
By the time I finally made it home, I couldn't do anything but crack open a beer and the rest of the Southwest snack packs. I polished off the oreos and have now started in on the Cheese Nips.
So that's where I've been. I know you were all just standing on your heads wondering what happened to me. I hope to stay close to home for a while now. I was having blogger withdrawals. And now I'm having snackpack withdrawals, so I better go find some more hidden oreos.
posted by Kimpossible @ 5/17/2005 06:59:00 PM
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