Come Back from the Ledge with Your Wine & Chocolate

by Jennifer Kellum Charbonnet

“Honey… Come in from the ledge. Bring your bottle of wine and your bar of chocolate, and come on. Honey, Baker and I miss you…”

There are many afternoons that I imagine this conversation between my husband and me. Sometimes I vary the fantasy for fun… sometimes it is two bottles of wine, sometimes, it is a bottle of wine and a book – gasp – that is not an educational board book created to stimulate little Baker’s mind. Regardless, there is no question that by the time 5:00 rolls around, there are days when I have just about had it.

The truth is: this stay-at-home-mommy gig is completely and totally, 1 million-percent harder than schlepping to the office everyday. You see, I have experienced both worlds, and until our nanny divorced us with no notice (a very well-paid, over-appreciated nanny, I might add … Oh, I guess that is another blog entirely), I was very happily a member of the paid-for-your-work workforce as opposed to this non-profit work of rearing my 15-month-old daughter, Baker. Even on the hardest days that required travel and lost luggage, or being grilled in presentations, or even being yelled at by irate clients, at least when I wore my old hat as Director of Sales and Marketing for a small software company, I could use the bathroom ALONE.

Ah, yes, the good old days of peeing in peace. Wow – what a concept. Now I have my little charge who likes to be with mommy all the time. I know that there are those of you who are at this moment saying, “Girl, get out of the house!” which I do. In fact, just this week I have finally joined a gym with a nursery, although Baker has only lasted 45 minutes each day due to “separation anxiety.” But you know what, those 45 minutes of seeing my formerly-svelte body jiggle (and this isn’t big-boobs-jiggle or sexy-belly dance-jiggle) to music that is NOT “The Wiggles” are fabulous!

The moment of truth – would I go back to work now? Not in a million years. Am I a masochist? Perhaps. But, I guess having seen how much Baker has blossomed in the last 4 months of my being a stay-at-home mom utilizing the latest child development tricks which I have gleaned from one of the 15 books on my nightstand that I am simultaneously reading, I will never be able to 100% relinquish her upbringing to anyone ever again.

I guess all that is left is for me to appreciate that I have a partner who understands that my 5:00 p.m. glass of wine is not a privilege, it is a necessity (although, he has no clue why), and to appreciate the fact that there is a supportive dialogue for women who have had their lives dramatically changed by child birth. So, if I may, I would like to toast all of the former obsessive-compulsive executives-turned moms and all of the women who have dreamed of this experience their whole lives. “Here’s to us supporting one another, loving our little ones, and ENJOYING our 5:00 cocktail!”